Thursday, December 20, 2012

THE WAITING GAME

It's been a week, almost two since my cousin sent in her DNA sample.  I say my cousin because we are 99% sure we are cousins but the DNA will tell us for sure.

I found this cousin about ten years ago as I was looking for my biological father.  We would be fourth cousins.  Since then we've shared information when we found it.  Sent each other pictures.  Then about four years ago she introduced me to another cousin.  This cousin would be a first cousin.  Now this cousin has sent me a lot of pictures of her mother and uncle plus pictures of the grandparents.

One of the first pictures I received from the fourth cousin was a one of mother, grandmother, sister and brother.  The brother being (maybe) my father.  The first thing that struck me was, I have a baby picture just like this.  I rummaged through my pictures and sure enough I found the picture, same poise, head tilted the same way, looked the same age, hair line looked the same, and same cheeks.  Now I told myself I was reading something into this picture because I wanted it to be the right person. 

Fast forward now to two years ago when I looked at a picture of one of my grandsons.  In the back of my mind I said to myself I've seen this face before.  I pulled all the pictures out that my first cousin sent me and sure enough there was a picture of my father (?).  Same ears, nose, and smile.  I sent a copy to my daughter and asked her if he looked familiar.  She agreed that it looked like her son.

So, now here I sit waiting for the results of the DNA.  Hoping that all my circumstances will pay off.  Were all these pictures something I was wanting to see in my mind.  Or will all of this together tell me that this man really is my father?

I'm on pins and needles.......but the friendship I've made with the fourth cousin will remain in my eyes and mind will always be my fourth cousin, no matter what.

Until then.......................

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