My fifteen year journey has come to an end and now a new adventure begins. It has taken me all of those fifteen years and yes, probably a few more than that, to find my biological father. There have been so many ups and downs, mountains, and valleys, but I kept on. And thanks to DNA I have found him.
I had known since I was eight years old that the man I called daddy wasn't my real father but my mother was very closed mouth about telling me anything. Every time I asked the question of who was my father, where did my father live, the answer I got was "I don't know."
I gave up after so many years of that. My mother took her secret to the grave with her.
In 1996 I got serious about finding out who my ancestors were. A friend suggested that I write to the city and state where my parents got their divorce. I did. I will never forget the day I received the paper work. As I read each sentence from the petitioner, my father, my mouth dropped further. My mind raced back through the years and all the stories I'd heard about my mother swirled. I felt like I was in slow motion and I kept repeating "Oh my goodness."
I reached for the stool by the kitchen counter and sat down. From the petitioner's request for the divorce I started reading the respondent's, my mother, answer. Another "Oh my goodness."
My father stated he caught my mother with another man, Bud Wyburn, and from that union my mother had a child. The child's birthday was my birthday. Another "Oh my goodness."
My mother's answer was "yes" that was true!
From that point on I began my search. Since my parents, and myself, were all from Minnesota I started writing letters to anyone and everyone with the last name of Wyburn that lived in the vicinity of Minnesota, Iowa, and Wisconson. Thank goodness postage was cheaper then!
From those letters I was put in touch with a lady in Wisconson and she has worked with me all these years to figure out the answer. In 2007 I had my DNA done with Family Tree. I upgraded several time even doing the Family Finder. Now mind you I did find some relatives, but all on my mother's side of the family. That was fun finding out that information. But I wanted more. We are all like that. We want more. I was on a mission and I was going to find the answer. My brother says I'm like a blood hound. Yep!
Then when Ancestry started doing DNA I jumped right in. When I first started with them they told you that you had a certain percentage of British Isles, European, and so on. Now they have broken it down to a much better understanding. When I found out I was 1% Native American I got goose bumps. Wyburn's great grandmother was full blooded Sac Indian. She survived the Black Hawk War in 1832.
Soooooo I asked my friend, which by this time I found out she was a fourth cousin to Wyburn if she would take the test for me. We were no match. Back to the drawing board. This was one of my very deep valleys.
Up to this point I was looking for something, someone who matched Alfred Wyburn and me. Then this last week it happened. Even though my friend, who is now my fourth/fifth cousin, still does not match me through Ancestry but we have eleven, yes eleven, same matches. I have a third cousin that is a fifth cousin to my cousin! We have a match.........we are cousins. Alfred Wyburn is my biological father!!!
Of course if a closer match, say a first cousin, would take the test it would prove with out a shadow of a doubt that I am right. But, I am comfortable with my decision until I am proven wrong.
You may ask yourself how can I feel so confident about this. There are several other factors that play into this equation that I've not mentioned, but between all of it I am confident.
Stay tuned....
Until then........................
I am very happy that you found what you were looking for. I've been following your progress since you contacted me about being 3rd cousins. I still don't know the connection but that's the way this whole thing has been for me. I will continue to search for my own answers about my maternal grandmother, just as you searched for your father. God bless my friend.
ReplyDeletePam Rader